307: The Abundance Dilemma

Steve Haase  0:00  
Welcome to the Superabound podcast with master coaches Erin Aquin and Steve Haase, where spiritually minded entrepreneurs learn to build a generous business without sacrificing what matters most. You are listening to episode 307: The Abundance Dilemma. Okay, so that's an intriguing name. What are we actually talking about the name is superabound. How is there a dilemma attached to the idea of abundance? Well, you know what we're talking about. If you've ever felt pulled in many directions and wondered, how do I actually prioritize? So another way to think of this is how to prioritize when you're pulled in too many directions, which, if

Erin Aquin  0:39  
you own a business, you probably feel like this at least once a day, if not many, many times. I was just thinking about this. I did an episode ages ago about creativity, and about how one of the things I believe, you know, sometimes people will come and they'll say, I'm so stumped. Like, how do you always seem to have ideas? How did you come up with your book? How do you produce a podcast all the time? How are you always that seem to have like content ideas at the ready? And I do this with my clients, sidebar unknown as the content whisper, which is a very loving, affectionate name that I will take, because really one of, I think my superpowers, is being able to listen to what someone's talking about, listen to the problem that they have, listen to the solution that they have, and really, like give them a stream of Really powerful content, ideas for articles, for social media, for how to create a tool from something that they've learned how to do for their clients, for their customers. And that's an amazing skill I will share that it's it comes from a belief I've chosen, I don't know if it's universally true, but it's the one that works for me, and the one I think everybody should try on is that creative ideas are always, always there. There's always about 100 different solutions, if not millions of different solutions and ways forward. When I think about the mountain of our vision as business owners, I think there's just an infinite number of paths up that mountain. And the only thing holding most business owners back is a lack of belief in their own creativity, thinking that the way that the business owner down the street, does it? Is how I have to do it, or how my industry works, is how I have to do everything, which, in many cases, is really not true. So I like to believe that if we're willing to be creative, and because creative ideas are always available, all you have to do is invite them in. There's always a solution. There's always a path forward. The flip side of that is that it can create what we're talking about today, which is the abundance dilemma, having too many ideas that you can't focus, having too many possible directions to try on and test out that it feels like you just are stuck in sort of, maybe like a decision paralysis of just not knowing what path of these 16 possibilities am I going to take.

Steve Haase  3:39  
And I think the reason people struggle with this is because, first of all, they're they're owning their business, they're in charge of their business, they're responsible for its growth. And so an idea will come to you in the middle of the night, like, Okay, we're gonna start focusing on this. Or someone will, you know, you'll hear something at a conference and you'll say, Oh, my God, we need to, you know, start doing more Facebook ads, or, you know, whatever the idea is, because you feel responsible. And these ideas for for growth, for new products, new directions to go in, seem promising. We all want to grow. And these new opportunities can feel either attractive, maybe you feel a sense of scarcity, or like, you know things aren't working the way they currently are, and so you need to just try a bunch of things. But the fact is, switching your focus, or even just keeping those doors open in your mind, like, hey, maybe we can try this. Maybe we can try that. It costs more than you think. The ability to focus in on a handful of priorities, or even just a single priority for a period of time, is so and. Genetically rewarding that its power can't be overstated.

Erin Aquin  5:07  
Yeah, and even though I'm I think of myself maybe as a little bit of a rebel. I don't like just working on one thing at a time, you know, okay, we're writing a book, but we're also launching a course. We're also doing a certification. I have a lot of programs. I have a lot of things on the go. That is how I work. That is I totally embrace that and love that about myself. But one of the things that I think has been useful, if you tend to want to have a bunch of different things going on at once, and you feel like it might actually be doing what Steve was talking about and hurting your business. I realized that when I feel panicked, I like, will create something new. Rather than trying to troubleshoot something that isn't working. I am totally like, throw it in the garbage. Let's burn to the ground. Let's try something else. And what I actually challenged myself to do this year is I gave myself within the business a canvas for me to create, for me to play. It was a really low cost membership that some of my clients could join. And I just kind of did all the fun stuff that I normally would have taken one of those things and, like, turned it into a program. You know, I if I hadn't had that kind of play space in my business, I fully would have, like, started teaching yoga classes or just done something, because that's who I am, and I'm not going to fight it. Instead having a space in your business, so you know, if we're talking about what that looks like for you, where it is your laboratory, it is your experimental space, but you're not pouring business hour resources into that too much. And I think that that's maybe the first place I would kind of offer is when you're in an abundance dilemma, when you find yourself switching doors and you know it's costing you something, it's really helpful to come back to the foundational things in your business that are working. And by working, I mean are fun for you to do that you enjoy them that are making money for the business, coming back to the really the core things that are currently working, and finding out how you can make those maybe more efficient, maybe simpler for your clients, maybe of higher quality, doubling down on the things that are working and growing those things is a really good way to avoid getting pulled in six new directions that are untested and just hate you and are un unknown.

Steve Haase  7:54  
And I think a big source of being pulled in these directions is comparison, right? It's kind of compare and despair. You're like, Well, my, you know, my firm is not as far ahead as the competitors firm. Let me start doing what they're doing. They got there in a completely different way, you know, FYI. And so the idea that you somehow need to take on someone else's approach to how they grew is going to put you in a weird spot, because you're going to miss like you just said, Erin, the things that got you to where you are, oftentimes, the path to growth is going to be in taking a close look at what makes you special, why people choose you. Like, look at your best clients and what brought them on board. How can you do more of that so that you can kind of grow naturally? If we, if we look at the natural world for inspiration, a plant doesn't just, you know, start growing and then, like, send out a new plant over here, that's an entirely different species. It's like, no. It just it grows as itself. And so the question of, you know, how do I get past this abundance dilemma? Because I could be a lemon balm, but I could also be a chive and I could also be a lavender is like, No, you are a lemon balm. Grow more of that. Whatever that means for you, right? So that means getting back to your vision, your values, and some of the, some of the ways that you've used those to grow that's going to have you flourishing in, you know, into, into the future business that you want to create.

Erin Aquin  9:35  
Yeah, and I want to say something about growth that I'm aware might not be popular. If your abundance dilemma is coming up because you feel like you're not growing in the way or in the speed that you want to one of the things that we watch a lot of folks do, and it's very tempting, is to look around in your industry at. People who created success before you, and I actually think that's one of the worst things you can do, not that it's not great to get inspiration and learn from people and like, you know, that's all good, but when I think about even as myself as a coach, the way the top people in the coaching industry grew their businesses 1020, years ago, is not really a viable pathway because the industry is so different now. So the last thing I would do is go to one of those top tier coaches and try to replicate what they did that made them successful in the 80s, the 90s, the early 2000s the world is different. The industry is different. The path is different. And I think that it's also if we believe, we choose to select this belief, that creative ideas are all around you, your path is just like one listening session with yourself away, one visionary practice session away. You're going to probably get more from knowing the state of things, where you are today, at your stage of growth, and building from there, rather than, like, take trying to take a time capsule, ship, time travel machine, sure, Doctor Who phone Doctor Hale phone booth. You're not going to do that and find like, an actual strategy. I think the strategy has to come from knowing that there's all of these different things building the business you want to create in the way you want to create. And that starts with being very clear on your vision and your values, rather than looking around and saying, like, how did this person who I actually think is really scammed me build their business? Let me just go do

Steve Haase  12:04  
that. Yeah, then it's gonna be yours. Okay? So you've got your idea for what you want to create. You've kind of said no to the things that are grasping for your attention. I think what's important here, and this gets back to your point earlier about wanting to do a bunch of things, is to work with yourself. So if, if not saying no kind of kills your soul, a little bit like but it's just feels so good, it feels so possible. But I know I want to focus find a way to let it still live. Maybe you create a parking lot, a place for the not yet ideas where you maybe you stub it out on your website. You have a page where you can play and as new ideas come, you kind of add to it there. Maybe it's an internal document where you can cook ideas with other people, build a prototype, kind of play around with things the laboratory. It's the lab, right? What kind of a lab do you need to create, either internally facing or externally facing, that will still give you that outlet so that your business is not, you know, feeling like a crushing weight of obligation, but is actually still a fun, enjoyable place without putting everything on equal footing. Because when you decide this is our way forward, you know this product, this focus, this persona, is our way forward, you do need to put the right energy behind that, but you can still Park things in ways that still feel generous to you and are potentially offering your next path of growth.

Erin Aquin  13:46  
I think it also comes down to understanding what your checklist for things to experiment with is and what it is not. I very often do get, like, I guess, no checklist with my clients, like some kind of a protocol, especially for my very busy clients who have a lot of opportunities coming at them that sound very enticing and are really interesting, and also happen to be time consuming, but could be lucrative, like there does, I think have to be something that maybe will feel a little rigid, but it's like a yes or no checklist. And you know, we love listening to the inner wisdom. So doing a gut check is can be it can be on your checklist. And you can say, Do I intuitively feel like this would be a step towards my next lantern a step towards my big vision. So you have to know what those things are. You have to know what your you know what your next lantern is. Is this aligned right now, internally, externally? Does it make sense? Are there things that I've decided already are an absolute NO. So when I have clients who um. Um, get a lot of requests for their time, for their energy on research work and proposals, meeting requests, meeting requests. I really do suggest, and we make this in our sessions together, but then they have the checklist sitting in front of them at their I'm looking down at my computer right now, like where the checklist is, these things are a yes for us, we use our vision and our values. Does this help people realize the life the universe is dreaming for them? Yes or no. Is this simple without drama? Yes or No? Will this revenue reflect the impact that we're having with this particular project, yes or no. Are we expecting magic when we do this? Yes or no. Does this interfere with non negotiable self investing? You know, is it going to take up way more time that's going to eat into our self care practices or our spiritual practices? Yes or no, and pretty much from there, it's so much easier to negotiate with yourself. You know, I like the gut check too. I like to say, Do I intuitively feel like this is a good idea or not? Yes or No, but having those things and having that clear list will let you not have the emotional burden of like having to make a decision on which 16 things am I going to what? Which one of these 16 things am I going to choose?

Steve Haase  16:26  
Well, because as as human beings, we don't want to be downers for people. We want to make people feel good, make people like us. And so saying yes to all the incoming is, you know something that people will want to do, but knowing what your no is going to be and having it be very clear and strong is how you give space for the Yes to really flourish. And this relates to what we talk about with tending your inner flame in the tending triad, where you have that personal filter, you create oxygen for that flame to burn brightly. It's true for yourself personally. It's also true for your business. You need to know what are the no's so that you can have the flame of your business burning very brightly, so that people can see it and the right people can be warmed and attracted to it appropriately.

Erin Aquin  17:22  
And when you have the dilemma of an abundance of choice, abundance of opportunity, I think it's good to also remember that these are good problems to have. It's so much harder to convince someone that they have creative opportunities and solutions all around them. That is, that's a harder task than saying, Okay, we need to pick one or two things here that are going to become the focal point for the next little while for you. And I think that maybe something that belongs on pretty much everyone's checklist is, am I going to be proud of myself for experimenting with this, for choosing this direction, even if I find out two months from now, it wasn't the choice for me at this time, knowing ahead of time and deciding ahead of time, that the choice that you're making today with the information you have today, which is limited, that you're not going to Go back in time and beat yourself up later. That is an act of self care and self investing, because we can only act from the information we have today. We can only decide what the best idea is of the group from where we're standing right now and later on, things may be revealed that have you change your mind, that's okay, as long as it doesn't come with a lot of static that you're applying to yourself. It's not really a problem, not really a dilemma at that point. Yeah. Which of my brilliant ideas will I pursue? Which of these amazing opportunities will I take exactly,

Steve Haase  19:02  
and it gets to the point of why we often let ourselves sit in that place of so much opportunity and no decisions made, or let's just decide on all of them, which is, again, no decision made, is that you're not seeing the path of success forward with the one that you do choose, you're like, I don't know what if I choose the wrong one, the one that you choose, you can make be the right one, but it needs your full investment in it. And so that's where in the book, we talk about your visionary practice. And so this is where you tune in to that future, where this choice that you made to say, Okay, this is our focus works out. There's a future in which it succeeds wildly, and a lot of people don't connect with that future. Instead, they sit in the what if it fails. You know, the. Mode and that so they keep everything else open, because this one might fail. But if you allow yourself to go into that future and you see, oh yeah, I see this really working. In fact, what did I do to make it really just sing, and you get that wisdom from yourself, and you infuse this moment with that confidence of the future, that visionary practice will give you the sense of confidence to take that step and to be the leader that your business needs.

Erin Aquin  20:30  
And we have a program that can help you take whatever you choose and actually develop it. It's called Grow smooth, where we walk you through the six big bottlenecks that kind of stop most businesses from really growing, and we help you develop your vision, your values, connect with your future self, heal the static that comes up, and do that over The course of a year together with community support. 

Steve Haase  21:03  
It's a beautiful thing. It's available at besuperabound.com/grow, and we'd love to see you there. Have a wonderful week. Take care.