Fear shows up in every business. But it does not always mean the same thing.
Sometimes fear is a useful warning that deserves your attention. Sometimes it is Static trying to keep you inside familiar boundaries. And sometimes the way you respond can pull you into one of two costly extremes: rushing ahead to prove something, or stopping so often that you lose your momentum.
In this episode, Erin and Steve explore how to tell the difference. They look at why "feel the fear and do it anyway" can become a dangerous rule when it replaces discernment, and how defensiveness around a new idea may be a signal to pause before committing your time, money, or team.
This conversation offers a steadier way to work with fear. Instead of treating it as an enemy or as a dare, you can examine what it is protecting, listen for any useful information, and decide whether the next Lantern calls for movement or restraint.
You'll hear:
How to distinguish protective fear from fear that maintains the status quo
Why defensiveness around a business idea is worth examining
The two speeds of fear, and how each one disrupts steady progress
How self-acceptance changes the decisions you make under pressure
Why trusted support helps turn fear into useful information
If you want support making clear, steady decisions for your business, begin with a Start Session. This focused coaching experience helps you work with the Static in the way and leave with a practical next step: https://besuperabound.com/consultation
You can also join Erin's Return on Joy newsletter for a weekly reminder that business and life are meant to include more than the hard things: https://besuperabound.com/collective
Welcome to the Superabound Podcast, where Vision-led entrepreneurs learn to build a generous business without sacrificing what matters most. You are listening to Episode 362: How to Handle Fear in Your Business. Hello, I'm joined today by Steve. Hey, everybody. Before we jump in, I wanted to mention something because it is
something that will support further exploration of today's episode. I have started a new email series called the Return on Joy newsletter and every week I am sending something out to my email subscribers all about something that brings me joy not only as a business owner, but as a whole human being. And some of these things are tools. Some of these things are
just little enhancements in our life that I'm really enjoying. Because one of the things that we always try to do here at Superabound is help you think through whole life success and what that really means to you. So as we are talking about how to handle fear as a business owner when it comes up for you in your business, I think those types of topics
get spoken about a lot. We've talked about fear many, many times. And I just want to remind you that the point of your business and your life is not just to handle the hard tough things. It is also to enjoy what you are creating. And so my little Thursday newsletter love note is designed to just inspire you to remember to take care of your own joy. And if you like some of the things that I shared there,
you know, you can try them for yourself. You're hearing this from the editor, and I can say it's delightful. I learn a lot about you by reading your messages. I'm like, oh, that's been a lot of fun this week. Erin definitely takes a moment to distill all the thoughts and things that are going on and say this is something that will boost you in a small but not insignificant way. Sometimes in a big way.
Yeah. And you know, for me on a personal level and for anyone who is really trying to bring more joy into their life. Knowing that I have to send that out every week is also good for me because it does not allow me to stagnate or, you know, stew on the hard things. But we are going to talk about one of the hard things today because if you run a business, if you even run a team within somebody else's
business here comes up. And if you don't know how to handle it, it's going to be problematic for you. Yeah. And I think the key distinction that we want to make throughout this conversation is that there is healthy fear that should be respected and listened to and followed because it's there to prevent big mistakes and catastrophes. And there is we could call it condition fear or.
unexamined fear. We'll have to figure out what word we use by the end of the conversation, which really is about maintaining the status quo and preventing you from expanding your boundaries into the unknown or somewhere that you haven't gone before. So, just as a broad outline for the conversation, those are kind of the two horses of fear that we're working with. So, it is really hard to.
turn sometimes the difference between fear types of fear because ultimately it's a survival response and all fear comes up to keep us safe. Yeah. That's its job. It's hardwired as a protection mechanism. There's a funny picture that a friend sent where he's posing next to a sign on the edge of a cliff and it says, listen to that nervous feeling.
inside you. And we had a good laugh because this is someone who gets some grief for being a bit cautious in their life. And they said, no, look, I'm just listening to that nervous feeling inside me. And so that sign is there to keep people safe and not jump off that cliff into the water below because it looks like fun, you know, to do a big flip dive. But it says, look, people can get hurt here. So we're telling you, listen to that fear.
that is like, you know, I have a pet peeve where sometimes like a really good idea turns into kind of like a rigid rule. Elana and I just did a whole podcast on business rules and stuff over at The Coaching Mixer. You can find that at besuperabound.com/coachingmixer, but we talked about business rules in the coaching world. And some of these things start off as really good ideas.
ideas, you know, the whole idea of feel the fear and do it anyway. In a certain context, the people who originally said that probably meant one thing that was really helpful for that particular scenario in which they said it. But now we have people say, I am afraid. So that's a good thing. I should lean into my fear and depth of that to die. And it's okay to be scared.
that is true. But when we take something and we kind of make it a blanket law. And then we try to line up our whole entire business and lot life behind it. I do think that is problematic. I think it's like really taking away the complexity of something that ultimately is designed to keep you safe. And it stops us from examining when fear is a nervous feeling that
it's designed to stop you from breaking your neck as you dive into something that you are not maybe prepared for. Yeah. Yeah. And so I guess as we approach this idea of fear, the starting place is to acknowledge it. And then process it. Whether that's by yourself with your journal and then bringing it to your coach or process it in real time with your coach.
Definitely do so with someone that can help you understand like, is this something that's going to open up my boundaries and help me stretching to something new, or is this just a bad idea that I'm infatuated with for whatever reason. And I'm taking that fear to mean I should therefore do it. Those are two very different paths.
Yeah. And I mean, you, of course, we are biased. We think you should always take these things to your coach or like whoever your person is, it doesn't have to be a business coach. It could be, you know, your therapist and other practitioner that someone you really trust who can hold a greater perspective of the situation and is not going to get embroiled in the emotional energy with you.
I would say actually that might be the discerning thing for me is when I have a fear.
And I am so protective of it. I don't want to share that fear with anyone and it feels very close and very like stubborn almost.
That is usually not a good place to be, you know, we've talked so much about fear is it is a, it's a state that I would connect as static, you know, it's the place between two clear frequencies, often you're feeling fear when you're stepping into something unknown, something that feels like it might stretch you.
But if you're not willing to talk about that with someone who you trust, I'm not talking about just like, you know, somebody with a really limited mindset, I'm saying, if you're not willing to talk about that with someone who you know can expand their point of view with you, that to me is like problem territory.
Yeah, and I think that comes into a fundamental feature of a successful business owner is that you can unfold these things, you can unpack these things knowing that you have a blockage around sharing this with someone is the first step towards being able to do so.
Because it's that not sharing that ends up having people jump off that cliff metaphorically usually and launching really bad business ideas because they were not properly vetted even discussed almost used as a, you know, an example of how strong you may be.
But you don't want to prove how strong you are with something as significant as a business pivot a rebrand a new product something that may be ill advised, but because you sort of feel that fear you jump anyway.
And that's the moment to really examine it.
Yeah, so I think what we're talking about is fear that you have a lot of defensiveness around and maybe an unwillingness to really examine because you think.
It's tough and through I don't need anybody I'm alone wolf and you're going to line up a whole business pivot and a whole marketing plan without getting honest feedback outside of.
You know, I know a lot of people say we know why I talked to my team about it and they thought it was a great idea I'm like, you talk to the people that you pay and ask them if it was a good idea.
I said yes support like if your feel if your energy is defensive around something and you're like i'm scared we're doing this because I really feel strongly about this new direction and who I want us to be and i'm so terrified and like that must mean it's really good idea.
I would say it would take a lot of guts for someone who you pay to push back on that.
Yeah, and that moment they're feeling the fear of oh my god what's going to happen and I can't say anything because boss seems really committed.
Yeah, they're very committed i'm going to get fired if I don't go along with it if I push back.
You know, I realize kind of the contradiction of one of the things we said is like okay, you could take those things to your coach I realize you pay your coach.
I hope you pay your coach I hope you pay them really well, but I think somebody who's not afraid to.
Yes, that was you to go really deep with you and find out what is the.
The static that's coming up saying what is the fear concerned about.
I think, you know, I notice with my own clients that like my long term clients people get less defensive over time about their fear, you know, more often than not they're like i'm sure this is.
A mindset shift that's going to happen but I felt so scared about.
What we were about to move into.
When you are not afraid of your own fear.
You can get a lot of wisdom and you can also usually figure out.
Is this a good idea that we've vetted not a good idea like will it always work out and be perfect but like is this worth the resources that we're putting into this new initiative in our business.
Well, and it strikes me that at the heart of this is your own degree of self acceptance.
And feeling at home in yourself in your life in your business, it kind of brings us back to where you started the conversation there and around.
It's not all about pushing it's not all about dealing with the hard stuff.
Sometimes it is just being okay with yourself actually loving yourself loving this moment, finding the joy in what's happening.
And the more you're able to do that, the less you're going to feel the need to prove something to yourself or your team or the world about.
How worthy you are right if that worth is deep and intrinsic, but you're feeling it you're present to it then your desire to show them.
Isn't going to win the day.
In the case of an idea that may best be left just in your own mind.
Yeah, I mean, I think that that's it's an important, another important distinction is like if the fear you're feeling has something is somehow tied to your identity.
It's like if this doesn't go the way that I have decided it should.
And I'm going to hate myself or I'm going to lose my position or my business is going to shut down like that kind of fear, I think is worth unpacking.
I don't think anybody should be glazing over decisions that if they don't turn out exactly the way that you were hoping that it's going to lead to the closure of your business.
So many people.
Sadly, sadly, people who know a lot about mindset gamble on ideas and say if I really just believe hard.
And I push and I.
Don't give that fear an inch like they kind of they get some like tough guy machismo thing going on women to and not it's not like a just a purely masculine thing.
There's.
There's something underneath that that I feel like we want to pause.
We want to pause in here, but that fear has to say because it's, if it's causing you to rise up and kind of go into attack mode.
There's probably more of the story.
Well, and that's why we often say always say business is a spiritual practice.
You have these moments that bring up.
How am I feeling about myself, what do I see my contribution being in the world and really reflecting.
Do I need to push this through do I need to you know force this initiative in order to have the impact that I want.
That's where the real magic can happen.
The irony is often the people who armor up.
Are the ones who really should be pausing and looking at what the wisdom in the fear is like what that fear really wants them to know.
And the people who may be paused too long, maybe you know really let fear stop them and or stall them and they have this kind of start stop thing in their business.
Let's talk about that maybe because that.
Usually, those people tend to have fear that stagnates not fear that really informs.
I think that's where the you know feel the fear and do it anyway these tropes all came from is because that's that is kind of a more common one and that is where coaching can be absolutely transformative right.
Surfacing what it what could happen kind of one of my favorite things to do is actually just play through the what could happen.
And find yourself in that gutter having lost everything because you you know made that phone call and then you realize yeah I probably won't end up in a gutter having lost everything because I made this phone call.
That can be really illuminating the the leaps that the mind takes.
And that a great coaching session can shed light on and doing that repeatedly can create that new habit so that even if you're feeling that fear you have the internal strength and the internal map for like no I can make this phone call I can take this action whatever that might be.
Yeah, I mean at different ends of the spectrum I feel like fear has two speeds it has the start stop like you're going to motion sick just from the stilted.
And on the other side of the spectrum it speeds through everything so the first fear that we talked about is tends to be more the speeding through it I'm going to avoid.
What this fear might be trying to show me.
avoid anything that looks like getting in there and listening to it because I don't even want to know what's going to happen I'm just going to make it all happen and so you armor up.
Stagnating fear goes very slowly. It starts, it stops, it ideates instead of taking action. And so if you feel like, okay, where am I on this spectrum if I'm having some fear come up? Are you speeding past everything and totally avoiding it? Are you starting and stopping, thinking more than doing?
as ideally with a with a thriving business more often than not you want to be moving at a steady pace.
You know you want to be every day connecting with your vision connecting to the next lantern in front of you moving towards that and some moments things are going to come up.
and you're going to want to stop because it's scary or you're going to want to flower head show the world because it's scary.
If you can get to a place where you're regularly getting support to examine your fears whatever side of the spectrum that you and to tend towards it will help you with steadiness and I.
think sometimes we struggle to articulate how coaching can help a business owner.
I think that that's really one of the most powerful things is it helps keep you steady.
yeah it's funny because it's not sexy or flashy like look at me i'm steady.
right super consistent yeah but that is how progress is made right if you can pause at the right moments if you can move at the right moments then progress is inevitable over the.
medium and long term even you know even if you're like stopping right now it's probably to prevent falling over the cliff and if you run in really fast it's going to be in the context of now is the time let's take action.
and over time you become a steady operator and yeah what was coming to me on the business is a spiritual practice side is the you know the Buddhist.
expectation that the path of the middle way they're like don't.
get rid of everything don't have everything like just the middle way just be happy with where you're at that's that's kind of my.
bringing in the ancient wisdom to this particular idea but I think there's some real truth there that the path forward is not like proving that you've got it or like thinking it up because it's really scary but actually.
being deliberate in how you move. Yeah, because either way, when you're in the extremes, you're in the Goal Swamp.
when you're in the extremes you are either moving so fast because you need to prove something to have the world see you in a certain way.
to use your external accomplishments for validation. That is a clear sign to me that somebody's in the Goal Swamp. And if you are not moving at all, you've just accepted your lot in life. Everything's too hard.
you know big mountains are not yours to climb it's all very like defeated and you're usually like exhausted before you do anything because you've spent so much energy thinking about it instead of.
pulling yourself up and on to the path you want to be on yeah that's that in this means you're actually climbing the mountain yeah.
So, the other side effect because I know what we're talking about is always sound fun like oh so what you're telling me what I should do as a business owner or as a leader is get a coach and then every week or every other week I should get on a session with them and like expose my fears work through those fears with another person like.
I would rather go to the dentist then do that beer doesn't really love to be talked about, but I will say this is my own experience as well as what I've witnessed with clients but.
What I've started to notice with all forms of static it could be doubt it could be confusion could be overwhelm fear of course.
The more I.
Ring that static forward, the more willing I am to listen to it deeply here what it's got to say get the gold nuggets of wisdom that very often it does have to offer.
The results of doing that stack up in my life and in my business so what I used to do as a business owner is I would.
I was the person who just avoid I was on over on this side of the spectrum I need that one sound really bad.
But like that was me I would just have an idea and I'd be like okay I'm inspired so that's what I must do I would talk to no one about it I would spend.
a month preparing something and then I put it out into the world and I'd be like tada.
And I would usually, like, I mean, sometimes it went well. There were successful moments, but a lot of times, like, crickets. Terrible results. And rather than examining that,
Because I kind of felt a shame that it didn't go the way I wanted I'd be like never mom you next thing let's go and I would just go through this cycle and I did this as a business owner for years.
When I finally started to work with a coach that I trusted.
And I.
Did not hesitate anymore to bring these things up.
I would move through.
Decision making in a much more steady way.
I was able to connect like what I'm thinking about or inspired about.
actually in alignment with my vision right now do I really have the bandwidth to do it and should I and how can I like market test this before I.
Four resources into it.
That shit works.
You know those things have helped us create a lot of success because.
They were in collaboration with the universe they were in communication with our community.
I still have wild ideas that I test out just for fun, but I'm no longer using.
A failed experiment as.
Like the finding who I am as a person.
Nor am I using something that worked to redesign my whole business around.
I actually see and I get a little bit excited. I'm like, Oh, I'm feeling some fear around this. Is this fear stagnating me.
Is this fear pushing me to something because I don't only want to examine all the stuff around it before I make a.
And informed aligned decision.
And I'm going to add up with somebody on a 30, 45 minute phone call.
Consistently has helped me move so much faster.
And I've watched the same thing with my clients they're like, I got some juicy stuff today and I'm like, Oh, what are we going to talk about not like we can kind of have a more.
Wonderful. Loving and I'd say like.
I know loving is kind of sounds like a cheesy thing to say, but like you can kind of just be like, Oh, there's some gold nuggets here in the dirt.
Yeah, it's real.
It's real.
And when you are not scared to look at those things.
The results start to stack up.
You're not like, Oh, I felt jealous and that's a terrible thing and I should never tell anyone. Oh, I felt fear about this experiment and I should never tell anyone.
It's like.
There's some gold under here. What are we going to find.
Yeah, and the more you do that, the more comfortable you become in that space. You know, it's like exercising your physical body.
It still is challenging, but you become more adapted to it more wanting it and it's we're basically talking about that with the emotional body.
Where instead of saying, Okay, I can share my happiness. I can share my joy, but everything else is off limits.
You start to expand into those other feelings and you realize that just makes me more human.
It makes me more awake and alive.
Therefore, more effective as a leader in business owner, but that's not the main reason.
Again, just coming back to that first point that the main reason for all of this is for you to have a life that you love and not just, you know, all the millions of dollars from being a successful business owner, but being at home in yourself.
Yeah, so long story short, don't just feel the fear and do it anyway, like blindly following something out of context.
Find out how to hold the fear, examine the fear, find out what type of fear you're dealing with and do not do this on your own.
Obviously, if you have to do it on your own, if you're not at a place in your business where you can hire a coach, we wrote a book called Superabound and we've walked you through how to work through Static emotions.
You could find that at besuperabound.com/book. But if you're a successful business owner, work with us.
You can find out more about how to get started at besuperabound.com/consultation and get on the Return on Joy newsletter list.
I think that's over at besuperabound.com/collective. Getting all the links. But all of it is in the show notes wherever you are listening to this podcast.
This week's return on joy is going to be a good one, so hopefully you jump on that.
And thanks, Steve.
My pleasure. Thanks. Thank you, Erin. Thank you, fear. Thank you, fear for not letting us jump off cliffs or, you know, any of the other ridiculous stuff that people do.
We'll talk to you again soon. Take care